The Answers I'm Looking For

Just a snippet from my first unnamed book. I'm quite proud of myself at the moment. I've been wondering just how I was going to bring God up in this book when, before I realized it and completely without any planning, AnnDrew was about to eat; and of course she had to pray first. And I suddenly realized...well, that was easy! I hadn't even tried.

I'm probably going to look back on this (and the rest of the scene...this is only a bit of it) and think, Did I really think that was so awesome? It's terrible!, but for now I'm quite happy about it.

She set one of the cups next to Alex's bowl, one next to her own, and held out her hand to him. He looked at it, unsure what he was supposed to do. 

AnnDrew looked at him quizzically. "Don't you usually pray before you eat?" 

"Pray?" 

"Yeah. To thank God for providing what we're about to eat. We hold hands because we're thanking Him together." 

"Oh." Alex took her hand, though still confused. AnnDrew smiled, then bowed her head, closed her eyes, and began to talk to someone Alex couldn't see. He was still watching her when she finished the prayer and began eating.

What do you think? Criticize it, please! I have so much trouble finding people who say something more than "I like it" or, when asked if they noticed anything, "I don't really know...um, well, you put an extra space here". Nothing wrong with that but I'd really like someone to be brutally honest.

• Is there anything about the wording that seems awkward, that I should change?
• Are there any spelling/grammatical errors I've missed?
• What impression does this give you of Alex?
• What impression does this give you of AnnDrew?
• Are there any discrepancies?
• Do I repeat any words or phrases too much?
• Were you confused by anything?

Obviously, the bit I've shared in this post isn't much to go by, but those are some of the questions I'm wanting answered.

Leave a comment! I'd love to hear anything you might have to say.

         

Reading and Numbers

I'm supposed to be reading right now. I've got something around 1382 pages to read before Monday the 28th. Usually, I call 13 my lucky number (I know luck has nothing to do with it but it's fun). However, in this instance, I don't believe it is [lucky]. Maybe it's the 2 at the end there...twos aren't good.

I love numbers. I act all superstitious about them but I don't really believe in all of that. Some of it, maybe, like how 7 is the perfect number and 3 is the number of God and 5 is the number of grace. That's all Biblical. But how people get super weird about it, that's not really real. I just like to play around cause it's fun watching numbers and looking for patterns, and finding them even if they aren't really there [in a superstitious way]. Thirteen is awesome, the best number ever. Thirteen, four, seven, and three are all good numbers. Any odd number is good. With the exception of four, most all even numbers are bad (including, sometimes, numbers ending in four). Actually, I never really thought about a system or anything -- I never really gave that any thought until just now -- but it seems I do have one of sorts, just not one that's easy to explain.

Anyway, enough of that. I need to be reading. But what am I doing?

I'm reading.

Oh yes, I am. Not right now, obviously, since I'm typing this post. Before that. Just not what I'm supposed to be reading.

I've been reading Anne-girl's blog and I simply can't stop! I love it. In fact, I've added a few posts to the lists on My Penslayer.

Roddy and Eric and Lywin and Annike and Miles and Barney and Binker and all the other lovely characters I've been reading about or from. Excellent. Beautiful.

Now off again to other worlds.

Slán a fhágáil, a chairde